2013... The Year of Dreams Come True :)

Well hello 2013. And hello, fellow bloggers. I know I haven't touched this blog in a long time. I'm sorry for that. The last time I wrote, I said something about training for my first half marathon. Well Dream #1 of 2013 came true on February 24th, at 6:17am. I ran, and completed my first ever half marathon. I rocked my tiara and tutu, ran through the happiest place on Earth with a smile on my face and a swollen body, Wreck It Ralph hands included. But 13.1 miles and 3 hours later, I had that medal around my neck. After the pain FINALLY subsided, it was the absolute best feeling in the world! To know I trained for something for so long, and made my dream come true, that I accomplished my goal is a really incredible feeling. I was in pain. I considered quitting. I was done. But something kept me going. Jeff.. my family.. my friends... myself. There's a strength within ourselves we really don't know exist until we hit a very hard moment in our lives. It came out of me like no other thing. I plan on running it again in 5 years, during the next anniversary. I plan on doing better, of course, but for now.. I'm basking in the moment of kicking butt. :)

After the race, and on our way back home from Florida (we drove down), we decided to make time to visit Ripley's Believe It or Not to see the fertility statues. Jeff and I discussed going back to SJF to start treatment again. On February 19th, we had a consultation with Dr. VanDeerlin, who was amazing. He knew my history, and was ready for attack. Provera, prenatal vitamins, and Tamoxifen were prescribed to me, along with Metformin. Forward to the day we were leaving Orlando, we figured visiting the fertility statues wouldn't hurt, since they were very well known to work. Needless to say, I pretty much fondled the crap out of the thing, and Jeff did the same (but not as much as me lol). We headed out and on our way back home.

I started my cycle March 6th, after about 6 days of Provera.. and this cycle kicked my ass. It lasted 10 full days, and did not let up for anything in the world. I was cramping, having backaches, the whole nine yards. I just figured it was really the cycle to clean me out, so to say. I haven't had a period since the last one on my own in Sept 2012. But nonetheless, I knew it would be worth it. After finding out that our insurance doesn't cover ANYTHING anymore, not even bloodwork or ultrasounds (since I was officially diagnosed per the insurance company), we went back to see Dr. VanDeerlin, who was ready to fight back. He had me start Tamoxifen on my own, with temping and using OPKs and charting. He wanted me to do it for 3 cycles. So for about 3 weeks, I was waking up early, taking my temperature, using an OPK, and charting everything. We tried to BD along with my chart, though it was kind of confusing. This was like starting all over again for us, and I never charted before.

After getting my chart looked at by one of my fellow PCOSers, it seemed like I ovulated between April 1st and 3rd. So my fingers were crossed and it was all just a waiting game.

Through all of the loving baby stuff, I snagged myself a new job, thank goodness. I'm seasonal, but it's a job, and its money. So I'm not going to complain too much, though I'm not caring for the fact that I work EVERY FREAKING WEEKEND. That's getting old, very quickly. I know it's money, but it's a lot of hours in one day to be standing there. We'll see what happens in the next few weeks though.

On the home front, we came back from Florida to some letters in the mail basically saying that the foreclosure is going quicker than we thought it would. So that forced us to start looking for places to live. After finding out we wouldn't be able to get a new mortgage for a few years due to the bankruptcy, we settled on finding a place to rent. After weeks of searching (well more like almost a year since realtor.com is an app on my phone lol), we found the perfect place in Williamstown. It's a tad out of our price range, but it'll even out. I'm excited. The house is smaller than this one, but its cozy. It's got a fenced in yard, and accepts pets. It's a quiet neighborhood, and we'll have our own driveway lol. It's the small things we enjoy. It's in between both of our parents, which Jeff's mom isn't too happy about.

That moves me to the next portion of this.. the not so good portion. Earlier this year, Jeff's dad was diagnosed with esophageal cancer, and also a form of bone cancer. He started treatment in February, and after 12 weeks of treatment, we found out that the chemo isn't working, and all existing tumors are bigger. So they are trying a different medicine. The only thing is is that Jeff takes his parents over to Philly for his dad's treatments, and right now, we are only literally 2 minutes away from his parents' house. When we move to Williamstown, we'll be over 30 minutes away. It's a big change, and we really don't know if Jeff's dad is going to make it through the year. At this point, prayers are going out to see if this medicine will work, and I just pray he doesn't suffer.. and that he's not in pain.

I also want him around to see at least his first grandchild. He deserves that much. We've been trying for so long, and I don't want anyone to not be able to meet our baby. He is a wonderful father, and an amazing father in law. And I know he'll be a great grandfather.

And he only has to wait about 8 more months. That's right. I saved the best for last. I am finally writing on this blog with a smile on my face.. and excited to say that we are officially having a baby!!

I found out Monday morning at 7am .. and it was confirmed by bloodwork at 1:45pm. I think I'm a little over 5 weeks now, and my numbers so far are good. I do need progesterone supplements, and will be on them for 10 weeks. We haven't told anyone yet (minus my job, since I do lift things), and I am waiting. I don't want to tell anyone until we tell our parents, which will be... ready for this?... Mother's Day weekend. :) I always wanted to announce it on a holiday or someone's birthday. Now that dream has come true.

I'm extremely excited, but equally nervous. I just want my numbers to keep going up, and this baby to keep growing into a little bean. :) Jeff is so happy, and equally anxious. We've just waited so long, that we are praying everything is okay and stays okay.

I'm exhausted and my boobs are killing me. I'm bloated and there's little cramps here and there. I had a little nausea spell last night at work. But I will take me feeling like crap as the best thing in the world, and I keep welcoming it with open arms. :)

Alright...time for me to get back to the real world. This is staying on here as a secret until after Mother's Day.. then maybe I'll make this post public afterwards.

I hope that I don't stay away from this blog for so long again. Until then, fellow bloggers.

oxoxoxoxoxo.